Yo Santa Blud, My Chubby North-side Bredjwin, Respect Man!

By Author: Jesse Jones
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Yo Santa Blud, my chubby north-side bredjwin, respect man!

Here's a shout out to the reindeer crew massive and your mini homies makin' all dem toys n bangin' Xmas stuff. Dis is my Christmas list, yeh? Last Christmas all I got was a ASBO an that was just wack. Saw dem quality Chav Mugs on Find Me a Gift, talk about quality man! Bling bling and all dat. So what Misses Santa gettin you dis year? Bet you get some fine-ass single moms cotchin on your lap eh bro? Gotta get me some ass, but muva says I gotta get outta the Job Centre and into a job before I get some fit bird. Den I can treat er to some fine bling like dat Diamond Bling Keychain innit?
http://www.find-me-a-gift.co.uk/christmas-gifts/unusual-christmas-presents-ideas.asp

Gotta keep dat flesh smellin' fresh man, hows about a Bling Soap on a Rope? And one of dem Snoop Dog style Gold Bullion Computer Mouse's would be well wicked! You ain't gonna leave a lump of coal are yez, cos that would be totally out of order innit. Totally misrepresented man. Ah yeah! And I want one of dem iPod Hoodies man. I ain't got no tunes player yet, but Dan said ...
... he can get one of some school kid or summit. He's a bit crank, nuff said.

Anywayz, gotta meet Rusty Rimmer about some wheels, Vectra 1.1 ei!

Safe man, peace out and fanks for der Xmas hoard if I don't seez yez

Your homie

Denton Kappa Boy Jo

Dearest Santa Claus

Please give my fondest regards to your reindeers and Elves, hard at work making toys and Christmas gifts. Please find enclosed my Christmas wishlist. Last Christmas I was unfortunate enough to receive an Anti Social Behaviour Order, heaven knows why. I saw those delightful Chav Mugs on the Find Me A Gift website and am rather fond of them! What shiny handles! Do you know what you are receiving from Mrs. Clause this year? Do you get beautiful young mothers sitting on your lap as well as children, you lucky cad? I must find myself a wife but of course mother dearest says I must get a job before being able to attract a fine young woman. Once courting, I can treat her to a Diamond Bling Keychain or something of similar vein.

Body cleanliness is rather important to me so I would appreciate a Bling Soap on a Rope if possible? One of my favourite singers is Snoop Doggy Dog and the Gold Bullion Computer Mouse looks just the ticket to match his style and class! I beg of you, please do not leave me a lump of coal as I would not like that. Oh yes! And I would also be grateful for one of the iPod Hoodies if you would be so kind? I haven't got an MP3 device at present, but my chum Daniel has offered to source one for me. He is a sandwich short of a picnic, but a nice boy really.
http://www.find-me-a-gift.co.uk/seasonal-gift/gifts.asp

Anyway, I must dash, I am meeting Rusty Rimmer regarding a used Vectra 1.1, huzzah!

Best Regards and thank you in advance for my Christmas presents,

Denton Kappa Boy Jo

Regards
Jessie Jones
Find Me A Gift

Because giving feels good......
Jessie Jones joined Find Me A Gift in May 2008 and has been writing fabulous articles for us ever since!