Some Tips To Assist The New Stepparent

By Author: Kathrine Bartosiewicz
Total Articles: 7
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Step children are a familiar component of many families, especially those that are recent divorcee's that have fallen in love. Working together, your new spouse and yourself will have to figure out some strategies to implement as the children and you learn to cope with each other. Step children can be a blessing, as long as you follow some of these common sense tips on how to properly nurture the positive relationship.

Raising step kids is most difficult if you have never before in your life been a parent. Sometimes people who never even planned to have children end up marrying someone who already has kids, and suddenly their lives are very different!

The way this is going to work is that both you, and these children, are going to have to adjust to having each other in your lives. If you want to do this right, just be supportive of your spouse when interacting with the children. All it takes is building a solid foundation, and sooner or later they will accept you in their lives.

Those that find themselves trying to fit into a household with teenagers, and not grade school children, may have their work cut ...
... out for them. All you can expect in a household with stepchildren in their teenage years is to be ignored and treated like most parents are at this stage. Although you should not expect acceptance, you should still have some respect and disciplinary actions should still be adhered to. Just as adults in the community should be respected by these stepchildren, they should also respect you and your role within their household. As a step parent, you should try to be supportive of teens as a friend, but also be ready to be firm when it's necessary to enforce limits. Step children in their teenage years are more than likely never accept you as their parent, so don't worry about it and just give it your best shot.

There are not a lot of subjects that are more delicate for you as the stepparent than what part the original parent, if any, will play in the lives of your stepchildren. It doesn't matter if the biological parent has passed on. Your stepchild will still hold them dear in their thoughts and can even refuse to give him or her up. This situation can become even more complicated if your new spouse is divorced from the biological mother or father of your stepchildren and sometimes feels conflicted. Even if the stepchildren were abused or abandoned by their natural parent, you must stay neutral at the very least. You should always respect the fact that this person was the child's original parent and not try to diminish their role (or memory) in any way.

As we've seen in this article, there are many aspects to being a step parent, and things don't always go as smoothly as you'd like. It is important that you keep a positive frame of mind realizing that you will have a solid and happy family in the future once the step children have had time to adjust to you. The acceptance by your step children will come over time; allow enough time to pass and you will, eventually, be an accepted member of their family.

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