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You Can’t Love Anybody Until You Love Yourself

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By Author: Saidur Rahman
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You Can’t Love Anybody Until You Love Yourself
One of the most difficult lessons to learn about love and relationships is that you can not love anybody until you know how to love yourself. Many people look for self validation when they are in relationships. Many people are very insecure and that causes them to unconsciously look to the person that they are in a relationship with for reassurance that they are good enough, pretty enough, or worth enough. Whenever this is present in relationships, it generally always leads to disaster. Relationships such as these do not normally last very long because one person is trying to be completely reliant on the other, and that is just not what relationships are.
People who have low self worth tend to be very clingy to their partner. A lot of the time, the person with low self esteem is so self loathing that they don’t think they deserve their partner. They have an irrational fear that the person they love will figure out that they are not good enough and will leave, so many insecure people end up smothering their lovers. When people are smothered beyond their point ...
... of comfort, it leads to failure in relationships.
The fear of rejection is one of the most prominent fears among single people, or people who are not confident in the security of the relationships that they have. Rejection is a completely normal and natural thing for anybody to fear. Nobody wants to feel as though they are not wanted or like they are not good enough. There is a reasonable amount of fearing rejection, and then there is a completely over the top, irrational fear that can invoke terror in people. The people who generally have this extreme irrational fear are generally those who are afraid of ending up alone, or feeling lonely.
Lack of self worth is a wide spread issue today among many people, although everybody feels as though they are the only person who fees as though they are not good enough. The truth is, everybody feels inadequate or inept sometimes, but you can not let that hold you down or stop you from moving forward. You must never let the fear that you are not good enough or the fear of rejection make you stop trying to move forward. How can you expect somebody else to love you when you don’t even love yourself?
You want to be your own biggest fan. Don’t be arrogant, but believe in yourself and be confident. Confidence is attractive. If you are confident in yourself and you walk with your head up, people will notice. You can never love anybody until you can love yourself, and you really can not expect anybody to love you when you don’t love yourself. You need to look for self validation within yourself so that you can look to your partner for support. You can’t expect your partner to do both of these things. Love yourself and love your partner, and they will do the same.
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