For Better Or For Worse

By Author: Fred Robinson
Total Articles: 26
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It sounds logical and it’s history before you know it: saying ‘I do’ to wedding vows and especially the ‘for better or for worse’-part of it. At the time these words are spoken, there is invariably a situation that can be categorized under ‘for better’. Wedding ceremonies are festive and when you’re in a festive mood, you don’t ponder on what you’re actually saying. If newly weds to-be would comtemplate this step, sales of wedding rings would very likely diminish.

Better times

Two people who decide to spend the rest of their lives together, make their intentions official by getting married. They have known each other for a long time, share a positive outlook on life and are not only lovers, but pals as well. Both partners also have a steady income, a factor that has little to do with love, but is definitely important for stability and the sense of equality. No one will deny that there’s a financial component in most marriages.

That’s the beautiful and fortunately often true story of the principal figures in a wedding. Not rarely children are already part of the plan. Children ...
... are of course welcome -when the time is right- to make the fairy-like picture complete.

Worse times

Before the wedding there may have been some disagreements, but those problems could easily be solved by focusing on the ‘bigger picture’. But after the status of married couple has been realized, the world doen’t look much better at all, and the bigger picture is not so visible anymore.

The bliss that characterized the period before the marriage, is nowhere to be found and less agreeable feelings, like irritation, start to creep into the picture (a person’s rudeness can suddenly become very annoying). Not necessarily a threat to the survival of the marriage, but what happens when real misery knocks on your door? When you lose your job and you have lost most of your appeal in the eyes of your partner?

Time for contemplation

Is getting married a good idea? For older generations it was only natural. But also nowadays lots of young women –and men apparently- feel that marriage is an obvious choice. There’s a lot of marrying going on, but divorces come in large numbers too. One might conclude that too little contemplation is spent on the consequences of the words ‘I do’.

In this article the author wonders if people think long enough before they put a wedding ring “trouwring” on someone’s finger. Wedding rings “trouwringen” are often exchanged too prematurely.