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Don't Be Sad

This is one of those things it's easy to say, but harder to do in the real world. It's like the equally annoying, Pull yourself together. As if you had not realized you were a mess and needed to do something about it. Well, if you were able to do any pulling in the right direction, you would have done it weeks/months ago. Why is it people seem to want to judge you for your weaknesses and failings. Why can't they be sympathetic and be more positive?
Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) is really one of those phobias but, rather than include it alongside a fear of flying or of spiders, the American Psychiatric Association (APA) prefers to treat it as being a disorder in its own right. It does not matter whether the APA is right about the label, the reality of the problem is very real to all who suffer it. Except of course, those who have SAD live in fear of what people are saying about them. Hopefully, the fact the APA spend months if not years discussing whether SAD people should be in a class of their own should not make them more afraid.
So how do we recognise SAD? Well, at one time or another, we all get worried about ...
... appearing in public. Some shake at the thought of having to speak in front of an audience. Others worry if they have a job or some other duties involving meeting and interacting with people. What will these people think of me? Will they find fault with what I say or do? But it becomes SAD when you get way beyond simple shyness or nervousness. This is the type of anxiety that starts weeks or months in advance of any event. It's usually one or two specific types of activity. Most social everyday living will be unaffected. We don't stop going out shopping because we fear the mailman knocking at the door. But if you know you have to make a presentation to a meeting or take responsibility for a function or occasion, then the anxiety can build to traumatic levels. This happens even though the occasion should be joyous, e.g. the rest of the family coming round for Thanksgiving.
No one knows for certain why this happens but, when it does, the approach is a combination of drugs and counseling. The doctors try to deal with this through talk therapy first. Even though your life may be disrupted, they think it better to solve the problem the natural way. If your anxiety fails to respond, the next step is Xanax. This is a balancing act. If one of your trigger events is coming up and anxiety is building to uncomfortable levels, taking Xanax may get you through without any problems. This could be a great success except it could equally convince you to take Xanax every time an event is coming. This is the first step down the road to dependence — something to be avoided if at all possible. So, you need to draw life lessons. Once you know you can get through without major anxiety spoiling your performance, you need to go back to therapy and learn how to do the same things without Xanax. This is a mixture of relaxation and other techniques so you can control your own emotions.
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