What An American Family Like?

By Author: allan
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But statistics are faceless and cold. They tell one story about changing patterns, but they mask other heartening stories — the ones involving real people leading daily lives. In the weeks since Sept. 1 1, the real-family has been acquiring a more positive image. Americans everywhere are acknowledging the family's strengths, overlooking its imperfections, and giving thanks for the domestic ties that bind. Perhaps nowhere is that strength ...
... more evident than in remembrances of those who lost their lives that day. At funerals and memorial services, and news stories, victims are being honored for all the ways in which they loved and cared for those closest to them.

Some of the most poignant tributes have appeared in a New York Times feature called "Portraits of Cirief". Every clay the paper devotes a page to thumbnail profiles of those who were killed at the World Trade Center. In interviewing victims' relatives and friends, re-porters seek lo capture the essence of how individuals lived: the qualities others remember them by, the activities that gave them happiness and satisfaction, the people they doted on.

The profiles bear silent testimony to the power of the American family. These men and women come from every economic group. They range from bond traders, accountants, and secretaries to firemen, electricians, and so on. But whatever their titles at work, it was their titles at home — husband, father, wife, mother, son, daughter, grandparent — that often reigned supreme in their hearts. Their families did not always conform to a 1950s ideal. Some people were divorced and remarried. Others were struggling to raise children alone. But whatever the- challenges, descriptions such as "warmly generous", "unselfish", "thoughtful", and "devoted" are sprinkled through the stories. An obituary may be the varnished public version of an imperfect private life. But to read these moving accounts day after day is to be struck by how central a role family, in all its varied forms, played in these victims' lives.

The Times intends to include every person whose life ended in the New York tragedy. Editors estimate that the project will take between 10 months and a year to complete. For each of the 300-plus victims already profiled, and for the 5 000 or so whose stories have yet to appear, the word "family ' meant different things. It also brought different challenges and rewards. When "Portraits of Grief" is finished, its sketches could create a powerful portrait of the American family. These poignant glimpses serve as a reminder that, although statistics may not lie, they don't always tell the whole truth.
The vignettes also send another important message: Don't sell the American family short. It just might be in far better shape than experts — and statistics — give it credit for.