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Oh! That Terrible Feeling Of Isolation

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By Author: Sunanda Biswas
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Boys are sensitive too
When it comes to suddenly being exposed to life in a residential school; boys are not different. At that tender age when a child starts his journey into the unknown; he is undeniably vulnerable and just as sensitive emotionally as one would normally expect a girl to be. It is a different matter that he may put up a brave front by not demonstrating frequent bouts of tears but upset he will be at least during the breaking in period. Many would consider this to be a healthy sign for parents who would have been as anxious as the child would before he left home to stay in a boarding. What; our son is actually missing home! It is quite common to see boys striking off each date in their calendars as DLTGH (days left to go home) with a dark pencil before turning in each night.

Everything takes time
Those who have had a first-hand experience of sending their boys even to the best residential schools in North India will tell you that homesickness sets in only for brief periods in the initial stages and is largely confined to times when a child ...
... is either too tired; is having some health issue; is finding it hard to cope up or is missing an important celebration or event at home. There could be many other catalysts too but nothing that the school cannot tackle. It is part of the growing up process so to say and this is where children learn to be independent. As a part of their job; good residential schools have a fully functional mechanism to keep track of children especially during the initial stages and have simple yet effective strategies to combat this condition. To begin with; a child is never left alone to brood by himself. He spends every single minute in the company of peers and remains under care of designated house seniors who report the slightest signs of unease, discomfort or withdrawal to the staff who by virtue of being experienced; come across in a most sympathetic manner by re-assuring and comforting the child. Some say that it is harder to observe signs of homesickness or isolation in boys as they may be less expressive and communicative than girls of comparable age. Most of the boarding schools in Uttarakhand have an in-house policy that actually encourages a child to share their anxieties with their friends and teachers especially when they miss their homes.

The routine takes care of it all
The best thing about a boarding house is the well- regimented curriculum that leaves little time for anyone to brood. It is common for a boys residential school not to allow new entrants any liberties like weekends off in the initial stages. This gives them time to get used to the routine away from their homes and works wonders in the end. In addition; a child is never left alone. There is always someone watching over you without being overbearing and as days pass; children begin to rather enjoy the challenges and stop missing home. With proliferation of social media and the internet; children find it easy to remain in touch with their parents too and some schools even ensure that a dedicated slot is earmarked during which children are encouraged to write letters to their dear ones. They are free to receive letters too and contrary to some misplaced notions; as a rule schools do not censor students personal mail. Your privacy is protected at all times. Experience however says that parents should avoid trying to remain in constant touch with their ward too often. Give him time to settle down and learn to take care of his anxieties on his own.

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