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Charmingly Written Article - How Do Your Words Affect People

By Expert Author: Ralph Adams

Do You Wonder How Your Words Affect People?
When you are talking to someone, do you make an effort to make him or her feel good about themselves? Do you try to build them up? Or do you put them down?
Do you even think about how your words affect others? If you do not think about it when you are talking, it is unlikely that you will be thinking about it when you are writing.
Edify Others in Written and Spoken Word
Edify others when you are speaking to them or writing to them. It is easy to do. Make a point of complimenting them in some way. It must be sincere, but if you make a habit of it, it will become a natural positive (charming!!) attribute of yours. When you build others up, they will like you (respect, admire, look up to, say good things about, appreciate) you. So not only will you be doing them a favor, you will be doing yourself a favor.
I met a young lawyer a couple of years ago who curled in the same curling league that I did. He was a "charming" young man and as I watched him, I noticed that he not only "charmed" the women but he equally "charmed" the other men. He always had something good to say about everyone. He did not overdo it but he obviously made an effort to notice something about each person that he could comment on.
This came to my attention one night in particular when I was especially rushed. I grabbed the first sweater that came out of the closet and ran out the door with my gear. When I got to the rink, I realized that I had not combed my hair and had left my purse at home so did not have a hairbrush with me. I had not taken the time to touch up my makeup, and the sweater I brought had no business being in my closet - it was much too old-fashioned to appear in public. Well, what can you do? You just have to carry on, right? At one point, this young lawyer and I ended up standing together waiting for the next shot and he looked at me and said, "You always look so put together. Tonight your gloves and sweater are exactly the same colour." I looked at my gloves and it was true, they did match one of the colors in the sweater. I was so focused on how bad I looked that I did not notice the "one" good thing about my appearance. But more importantly, I did not let my team down by showing up late because I worried about my appearance (maybe they would rather I had shown up late!!).
This young man was quite sincere and meant this as a compliment and I accepted it as such even though I was tempted to "pooh-pooh" it. The point is that he made me feel better about myself - he edified me, built me up. I have not seen him since then and I do not know whether I would recognize him if I saw him again, but I do remember how "charming" he was.
You Have a Choice - Build Up or Put Down
How do you want to be remembered? Do you want to be remembered for building up your readers or for putting them down. Do you want to be remembered as the arrogant know-it-all who insulted people in written (and likely spoken) word or would you rather be remembered as the "charming" writer who made people feel good after reading your article or blog?
You Don't Have to Lie to Build People Up
You do not have to lie to people to build them up. In fact, lying would not really build people up at all. But there is usually something good that you can find about someone if you look for it. Making others feel good makes you feel good.
Try it. Add some charm to your blog.

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