How To Pick The Right Marriage Counselor And Therapist?

By Author: Rosalind Cardia
Total Articles: 30

Marriage has been considered as a forever commitment since the beginning of time and still it is regarded as the most important and thought-out decision in one's life. However, there are times when you have to face troubles in your marriage. Marriage counseling is no more being talked of in hushed tones, in fact, if yours in the marriage on rocks, it is better to give it one last chance by seeking therapy or counseling.

In the fast paced society, even the best marriages are failing to last for even months let alone years, accounting for the rise in divorce rates in the past few years. As such, marriage counselors can turn out to be great problem solvers.

Before you settle for a counselor or therapist to save your marriage, it'd be good to keep a few things in mind. Decide on the real issues you want to seek marriage counseling on. The issues can be anywhere from emotional conflicts, parenting differences, depression, infidelity, domestic violence to substance abuse, bereavement, and infertility. Focus on looking for marriage counselors that has a legit degree in their field instead of relying on the ones that are self taught or workshop trained. More the experience, the better. Look into the programs the counselor has to offer. These can be individual therapy, conjoin counseling or group sessions including various activities to help the couple bond and communicate better. The success of a marriage counselor depends entirely on the number of relationships that have benefited from their advice, therefore, if possible find out the statistics related to marriages saved and customers satisfied.

Attend demo sessions offered by certain therapists which will help you to get a better insight of the ways and methods the therapist employs to improve your relationship with your spouse. Talk about the duration which would be best suitable for you. Once, enrolled, keep in check that the counselor is actually satisfying all your requirements. A good therapist instead of sitting passively while you and your spouse turn the discussion about your problems into a brawl, will try to intervene calmly and attempt to improve your conflict resolution skills without picking sides. He will tackle individual issues at the same time by using techniques to understand power struggles, emotional patterns, defense mechanisms and basic differences between the two people and fix specific goals to be established by the end of the day.

Although money comes secondary when you are trying to work on a marriage, it is still necessary to go for an affordable therapist. Plan out the amount you are planning to spend, whether it would be a full payment or installments. Some therapists charge according to the income of the couple while some may honor your health insurance. Make sure you select a schedule you can easily stick to and find out how far in advance should you inform about canceling an appointment if you have to. It is up to you to decide, if you'd be more comfortable with a male or a female therapist. A few therapy sessions in, it would be good to check in with the therapist regarding your progress and offer feedback if necessary.

A skilled and a capable marriage counselor and therapist can work wonders for providing a room of improvement in your failing marriage. Remember Rome wasn't built in a day. It may take you several sessions to get your relationship with your spouse back in shape, but having someone help you along the process and figure out things when you couldn't, is probably what you need right now.

The author of this article is Rosalind Cardia MFT, a leading marriage and family therapist serving couples and families in Los Gatos, San Jose, Monte Sereno and other surrounding communities.